So, what should you do when you mess up? Sometimes it's big, sometimes it's little. First I suggest putting the situation into perspective. Let's say you go to meet your partner for lunch and you forgot that they had a work meeting. Maybe you text him/her a few times after you get to their workplace, but since they are in a meeting, you don't get a response. Maybe you start sending them less and less friendly messages, until they finally are out of the meeting. Suddenly, you're reminded of the meeting and instantly regret what you did. Depending on how your significant other reacts, you can either apologize or just let it go and move on.
Here's an example from my own life: Last night, the literary and art magazine that I am managing editor for had it's fall 2014 release party. At this event, staff members were running all over campus trying to set up for the event. Once the event was over, I realized that my iPhone was missing. I looked under all the auditorium chairs, on tables, in couches, until I realized that I must have left my phone at the library's information desk. I went to the desk to see if they found a phone and they did not. My husband checked his coat pockets and went to check in the car and it wasn't there, either. I went back to the information desk to double check and a sweet, sweet older gentleman said he would check the security surveillance. After a bit, he came to me and said that they could see that took my phone with me. At that point, I figured that I had set down on an event table and someone picked it up. I looked at Dylan again and asked, "Are you positive you don't have it? Check your pockets, again." He pulled my phone from his pants pocket. Some of the magazine staff stayed with me, trying to figure out what had happened and they all had a good laugh once we found my phone.
When walking to our car to head our for post-party drinks, I asked Dylan to look at me. I gave him a little smirk and said, "That's all I'm going to say about it."
So even when crazy shit happens, you can still keep your head high and forgive. You can't be mad forever over a mistake. Dylan had moved my coat earlier that evening and had my phone fallen out and disappeared, I still would have forgiven him. It may have taken more than a few days, but I would have forgiven him, in the end.
That's what it's all about, being in love and being human. If you can't let go of the mistakes people make, even in your friendships, you won't move forward. That's where enemies lie, in the toxicity that ruminates from unforgiving hearts. Put it into perspective and always remember that a person is not the some of their mistakes. All of our mistakes are fuel to make us better people in the future, fuel to grow beyond what is measurable.
