Indiana, the state where I was wed and where I live, decided that the same-sex marriage ban that was in place is unconstitutional and began allowing same-sex couples to marry immediately. For those who don't know me personally, it is well-known that I am a huge supporter of same-sex marriage, as I believe that for A-L-L Americans to live life freely and have the true right to life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness, we all need to have equal rights in every way. I admit that after Dylan and I got married, I felt guilty. A newlywed, happy and in love, and I felt G-U-I-L-T-Y.
I felt guilty knowing that my friends who are gay weren't allowed the same privilege. They weren't allowed that day of love shared with family and friends. They weren't allowed the 1,138 federal benefits that I got by signing a piece of paper. They weren't allowed more adoption options once they were wedded. They weren't allowed to call each other "husband" or "wife," especially in the eyes of the law.
Marriage is and should be based on one thing: L-O-V-E. The most important 4-letter word there is in the english language. Love means so many things, but most everyone agrees that we all deserve to love and be loved by a significant other. I take my marriage seriously, too, for those of you who may disagree with my point-of-view, so I don't want you to think that I don't because I think same-sex marriage should be legalized by the federal government. This also means that, in no way whatsoever, do I believe that the government should have any control over who we love or marry based solely on sexual orientation. I take marriage, as a whole, very seriously. I was married at age 18, and I knew then, as I know now, that marriage, a fabulous union that allows for mutual respect, mutual support, and mutual love, is a P-R-I-V-I-L-E-G-E, no matter who you marry.
Besides my personal opinion on the legal aspect of marriage, it takes two very C-O-M-M-I-T-T-E-D people to create a successful marriage. (I choose "committed" over "in-love" because as long as both are truly committed, giving the other person their best, I believe, there will always be love.)
While being in college, I've seen so many girls and guys in and out of relationships, over and over. It seems that when people break up, it is typically because of one person's selfishness:
"She visits her family every weekend."
"He spends too much time going to the bar with his friends."
"I just don't have time for a relationship."
"Who wants to be tied down in college?"
So, yes. Commitment is the proper word for why relationships and marriages are successful. And really to make it through today's dating scene, you have to be committed to putting up with quite a bit of bullshit from those you date, until you're committed enough to call yourself "exclusive" and eventually lead to a possibility of marriage down the road. I guess the other word used to describe marriage would be C-O-M-P-L-I-C-A-T-E-D.
I am so happy that I do have a successful marriage where my husband and I see so much from the same perspective, where we are both committed. I'm lucky that he knows what it means and what it takes to be a married person. At the end of the day, all actions inside a relationship or marriage are built on the initial love that you share. I love love. Marriage is a wonderful step in life that is extremely special and, albeit scary sometimes, exceptional. Best friends. Lovers. Dog-wrestlers. Frisbee-throwers. Exercise partners. Thunder buddies. Roommates. Teammates. Soul mates.
So, no matter what side you stand on, can't we all just agree that marriage is B-E-A-U-T-I-F-U-L?
